Shane

Okay, I took far too long to finally sit down and do this, but here it is: My best attempt at typing out my week with my love. I've likely forgotten some details by now, and the ordering of things and what exactly happened on what day... but you'll get the general idea anyway. I should warn you that this will be very long, which is why I'm starting the cut right..... now.

( A very, very long entry including sex, mushy stuff, kinky stuff.... you know, the usual )

Okay, this still isn't the full update I promised... that will come later. Right now, at 6AM, as the sun rises, I want to write about this extremely intense experience while it's still fresh in my mind.

Yeah, you guessed it... another pain session. This one was so much more emotional than the last... last time, I enjoyed it, and it meant a lot, but we weren't in love. This time, we were, and it made so much difference. I suppose it's about time to start that cut now.

( Relatively in-depth discussion of BDSM practices )

Current evens have me once again in Durham, NC... but before I begin to tell that story, I need to do a huge update. Before I do so, however, I must give a reason for my lack of updates.

See, at one time, I though that I only updated during "down" parts of my life... talking mostly about things that made me unhappy. I have revised this thought. I realized that I generally update during times when I have stuff that I feel like telling people, but don't have anyone in particular who cares enough to listen. So I put it on here for people in general to read. This is why I havn't been updating; I now have someone special to share ever bit of my day-to-day life with.

( Love-life update )

As mentioned before, I was kinda in a bind with regard to school. Since I needed to stay full-time and had about a week to find a college, I went to the only one I knew would take me; ACC. I graduated from there with an AS in Computer Science, but I discovered that by changing majors (IT - Computer Programming... very, very similar major) I could take some more classes there and stay full-time until I found a 4-year school. This time, of course, I'm going to apply to as many as I can, in the hopes that one will accept me.

So, I'm back at ACC. All my classes are in Scoville now, hehe... that's the computer building. One of the first things I noticed when I walked in there is that there are no longer the 5 or so useless computers that used to occupy one hallway... it's been replaced with some desks and a little hang-out spot. So many geeks, it's wonderful... there were at least 10 of them when I walked by. The first couple times, I saw Magic cards and the creation of chain-mail.... next time I walked by, D&D. I've found my new group of friends.

I don't know any of their names, yet, but they were all quite friendly. I was suprised to discover that DDR club is still in existance. I left around the same time as most of the other officers, so it didn't seem like the club would live on... but apparently it has done so, even if just barely. I'm going to have to check it out on Friday when they meet. Don't know if I'll go every Friday, but I'd like to stop by at least once.

Everything else about the school seemed about the same as usual; Luke was teasing Linda about the abacus she keeps in her purse (both professors in the CS department... in my two years there, I came to refer to them by their first names, probably mostly because of Kyle) and all the other usual stuff. In case you're curious, carrying an abacus around isn't as unreasonable as it might sound; as of 1946, it was still the fastest computing device in the world. In 1946, a competition was held between it and an electric calculator, and it won by a huge margin. For amusement sake, I'd like to pick one up and learn how to use it, myself, even if modern scientific/graphing calculators are far better than those used in 1946.

Anyway, I think that's about all. Classes were good. Will attend more tomorrow. I'm probably off to give Katie a phone call, now. :)

Okay, so the album has only been out, like, 2 years, and I finally got around to reading the lyrics to some (one) of the songs on Ruby. And I think I have a new favorite. I always liked it for the sound, but now I like the lyrics as well.

I know some of you hate myspace (while others love it) but it is the best place to hear the song for free... Go ahead, click it, you know you want to.

I think that's the first time I've done an html link without looking it up. Good for me, I've mastered some of the basics of html. :P

Edit: Blah, I spelled href wrong the first time and put herf... so bad for me. XP

Anyway, I decided to put the lyrics here, though in a cut, since lyrics tend to take up lots of space.

( By July lyrics )

It's such a catchy song, too! Uncomfortable is quite catchy, too, but with more questionable lyrics... though I know at least one person who would probably appreciate them. But that one's off "Away From Here," which is why I know all the lyrics.

Okay, I know I'm usually more up-front, intstead of leaving people wondering what I'm talking about, so I'll explain now for those of you who are like, "Sirsy? Who?" Sirsy is a local band who I both know and love, with a sound that could definitely make it big, and hopefully someday will. Going to a CD release party of theirs on Friday, in fact, which is part of the reason I'm going back to their last major album and familiarizing myself with it like I did the other two big ones... I feel like I've been a bad fan.

I've been reading the "New Mutants" comics... a series that kind of spun-off fromt he X-Men in the early-to-mid 80's. The X-Men were off fighting the brood... Xavier thought them dead, and took in a new group of students. I havn't really heard that much about them, but now that I'm reading, I'm getting to really like them.

Alas, the two that I think would make an amazing couple, I know they never do, officially. And only because they're both female. If one had been male, and they had behaved the same, it would've been impossible not to consider them a couple. But I found a Rahne fansite, and there was Dani, under the "friends" section, not the "loves" section. What angers me the most is, from the same fansite...

"Rahne and Dani were so close that they would call each other 'darling,' 'my heart,' and 'soul mate.'"

How is that not love? Goodness, they make such an adorable couple, too. I've only read the graphic that started the series and one issue, and I want so much for them to be together.

This is what drives people to things like fanfiction, heh.

Edit: Okay, I found at least one site so far made by someone who agrees with me: http://www.wgp.org/rahnedani/index.html

I’ve been typing up all my journal entries in Word, these days, since copy/pasting from there is a good backup in case something goes wrong with LJ and it doesn’t get posted. Not that anything has ever gone wrong with LJ... maybe I’ve been using Gaia too long... but it is still technology, which can be quite unreliable if you don’t take the proper precautions. Anyway, it also spell-checks a lot easier than LJ, corrects some of my mistakes for me, and gives me a good guideline for cutting, now that I do that regularly. Basically, if an entry stretches over a page (in other words, if it’s worth typing up in Word at all) I’ll cut it. I’ll never cut an entry based solely on content; I’m firmly against censorship, which is why I avoided cuts in the past. I just don’t want to flood peoples’ friends pages with my uber-long thoughts. So I’ll provide a bit of background on what will be in the entry, then dive into cut-land. This entry is going to be me stressing about where my life is going. Brace yourself, it could get ugly.

( Cut for length as explained above. )

This entry is bound to be rather long and filled with philosophical thought. If I've chosen my readers correctly, this should excite you. ;) The size might seem a bit daunting at first, but if you take the time to read it, I think you'll enjoy it. It should be at least somewhat thought-provoking, and may leave you feeling smarter than you felt before you read it.

( Cut for length; I don't like the idea of flooding peoples' friends page. )

This entry is targeted mostly at Kait, but there's nothing here others can't read.

It occured to me, just now, that you're probably still blocked on AIM and other instant messengers, despite the fact that all is now forgiven and forgotten, and we're speaking again. So I went to take a peak at my block list. Yeesh, I didn't think it'd be as long as it was. Particularly on Yahoo, where they tend to bot me a lot. There were one or two names I knew were you, but plenty more I had no idea. Plus, I have no idea if you even still use any of those old names.

So, I guess as a blanket statement (though, like I said, I think it only applies to Kait) if anyone here is currently blocked on AIM, Yahoo, etc., but wishes to be unblocked let me know in one way or another. If you don't feel like posting your screenname here, send me an email.

Before you read this entry, I must warn you that it will go into a lot more detail than I usually do. If in-depth descriptions of really kinky sex bother you at all, just stop reading now. Skip over this entry, go read another or something. The same goes if you are bound to get terribly jealous of someone when I enjoy a wonderful 3+ days with her. Attachment doesn't bother me, jealousy does. If you can't handle reading how I feel about her, don't read it.

( Look, I finally looked up how to do LJ-cuts! )

How is it that a guy who has had at least semi-romantic contact with at four women today be lonely? I guess it just goes to show how much of an attention-whore I am. =P

Maybe it's just this... yes, I've got beautiful women who enjoy talking with me and spending time with me... but none of them are online to do so right now. I've become so used to the affection in this past month or so that during the times it isn't here, it's even harder. Makes me sound selfish, I know.

In any case, things have been going well with all of them. Shannon and I have been getting along great. I'm a little envious that she's got more viewers on her webcam than I have on mine (on mine, there's really just her, heh) but I am working to change that. I can't wait to meet her. I think she reminds me of my early days of dating, to some extent... she has some of the same qualities I liked about Amanda and Kaity.

Tiphony just IMed me tonight. She couldn't be on long, but she told me that she thinks about me more than she thought she would... which is really sweet. Less than three weeks until I see her again. It feels like there's something wonderful building there. It'll be great when she's around again.

This coming weekend is when I finally get to go to NC to meet Katie. She's been away visiting her family up until today, so we havn't been talking as much. In the past couple days, though, we talked a lot more, getting to know each-other more and more. In our last conversation, she showed me her LiveJournal. After reading a couple entries, I decided I wanted to read it all, as to know as much about her as possible before I visit. I started up writing emails to her in response to each entry. It occured to me to comment on the entries themselves instead, but I decided I wanted my thoughts on them to be a bit more private, for now. She's been enjoying the email so far, and I think we've both learned a lot more about each-other because of it. She's the sort of person I feel a need to impress, for one reason or another, even though our time together will be limited.

I chatted with Renee tongiht as well. Not much news on that front, except that she does plan to download Yahoo Messenger (now that she knows there's a version for OSX) and will hopefully be able to watch my webcam. More attention makes Shane happy. :)

Goodness, I do sound selfish. All this attention, and when they're all offline, I go talk about them in my LiveJournal. Oye... someone slap me.

So, I was talking to Renee earlier today (okay, technically yesterday, now that it's after midnight) and the following conversation was had:

(15:45:13) Renee: so, hear from your girl?
(15:45:37) Shane: Um... I don't think that statement is specific enough. ^^;
(15:45:58) Renee: damn, youse a playa, aren't cha?
(15:46:09) Renee: :-P
(15:46:57) Shane: A little bit. I wish there was a more positive term... that one seems to be paired with dishonesty, and I'm never dishonest.
(15:47:21) Renee: there's very few of your kind
(15:47:45) Shane: :) Well, luckily, there's enough of me to go around. :-P
(15:47:56) Renee: how about this - casanova
(15:48:24) Renee: you. the legendary lover
(15:48:38) Shane: Hehe.
(15:48:43) Renee: pleasing women, just to make them happy

To be honest, I hadn't heard the term used all that much in this context, so I Googled it real quick and got the following definition:

1. A man who is amorously and gallantly attentive to women.
2. A promiscuous man; a philanderer.

I decided the term fit, so...

(15:48:54) Shane: I like that one better.
(15:49:05) Renee: :-D

So, on the ride home tonight, I decided to make a list of the women currently on my mind, since that's what most of this journal usually is anyway, in one form or another. In no particular order:

Tiphony - It's hard to believe we only met 8 days ago. Although our time together was short, and now she's in Florida for a month, we had some great times. Definitely looking forward to her coming back... getting to know her and her friends, hanging out, etc.

Renee - She's kind of with a guy named Gabe... she insists they haven't officially become "boyfriend/girlfriend," but it seems like it's only a technicality. He seems to think of them that way, and until that changes, I don't really want to get too close to her. Guess it's part of my usual confrontation-avoiding tendencies. From the way she's talking, he may not be around much longer, at which point I'd love to get to know her better.

Katie - Yes, one of the girls on this list had to be named either Kate or Katie. =P This is the one I'm flying to North Carolina to meet in two weeks. Should be a lot of fun; we've talked a lot on the phone and online, and I think we'll get along splendidly. She seems a bit quirky, but in that sexy, geeky sort of way.

Shannon - We only started talking recently... we'd met on OkCupid and talked some, but then kinda stopped chatting for a while, until I got my webcam setup. Then, Monday night, we had a nice, long conversation... and we've been talking, exchanging pictures, etc., ever since. She's even planning a trip up to meet me; she lives down near NYC, so the drive is long, but doable. I can't wait to meet her... she's a really sweet girl, and I really enjoy my conversations with her.

So, that's about it... I guess I should head off to bed, it's getting late.

Instead of updating you on my love-life (which is still going quite well... there are things to update about, I just don't feel like talking about them right now) I'm going to tell you about my new little hobby. Well, okay, it isn't really new new, but I havn't done it in a good long while.

See, I miss the days of having a webcam... talking to people on it, sometimes removing my clothing.... yes, I'm an attention whore, leave me alone. =P Anyway, I decided to try and get my little webcam up and running again.

First, I did a search around to see if any good sites have popped up since I last checked. By good, I mean that I'd be able to set up some sofware to have my cam viewable 24/7, allow people who view it to chat with me while viewing it, to have the whole thing accessable through an internet browser, to have it free for both me and the viewer, and to give me complete freedom (rules-wise) about what sort of content I show on the cam.

Long story short, if such a site exists, I havn't found it yet. The closest I found was ww.com, which allows people to view non-adult cams for free and adult cams for a price. I can kinda understand their viewpoint, but it doesn't suit my needs, so I won't use it.

So I went to IM services. Last time I wanted to webcam, I had the most luck with those. The only downside was that I had to be able to invite people to use it. Call me voyeuristic, but I like the idea of people being able to just pop on and start viewing my cam at almost any time.

So, first I tried AIM. Just like last time, it's terrible. Set up the cam on my desktop, AIM on my laptop, got them talking... nothing. Too much trouble.

Next I tried MSN. Got it working, streaming the cam and everything. Unfortunately, as I suspected, you have to invite people to view it. Which is okay for when I just want to talk to one person and show them my webcam, but not great in all cases.

So I went to Yahoo. Just navigating the menus, I've decided that if I actually used the actual clients to IM (I don't, I use Gaim) Yahoo would be my messenger of choice. It's great.

The settings are excelent. I can very easily switch between anyone being able to see it (the setting I'll leave it on most) to invite-only (for talking to particular people) to completely off (which can also be accomplished by closing the little lens-cap on the cam... one or both of these methods will be used, for instance, when someone is over and we'd like some privacy. The cam is in my bedroom, after all).

I created a new Yahoo ID for this purpose. Now, before I give it to you, let me make this clear. There may be adult content on this cam. At the very least, if you sign on at the wrong (or right, depending on how you look at it) time, you may catch me without any clothing on. If the thought of seeing me without any clothing on bothers you in any way, I suggest you don't view the cam at all. If you do want to view it but don't want to see me naked, contact me first (IM, phone, whatever) to make sure I know you're watching and don't want to see any of that.

For those of you still wishing to view it (some of you, no doubt, eager to do so) the name I'm using on there is Zetancam. If you don't have Yahoo Messenger, you're going to need to download it. You may or may not need the latest version; if you have an old version and don't want to upgrade, go ahead and try it. Either way, once you have some version of Yahoo Messenger, you need a Yahoo ID, assuming you don't have one kicking around. Most people have one, but if you want a new one (or a different one for this purpose) the messenger itself has an easy way to create one when you first start it up. Got all that? Now just add a new contact, and enter Zetancam. All the other new contact fields can be left blank. Once all that is done, there'll likely be a link next to Zetancam on the buddy list that says "View My Webcam." Click it.

I realize the above instructions might be insulting the intelegence of some of my readers, but I try to make instructions as specific and universal as possible, so hopefully you got what you needed out of them. Hope you enjoy.

As I said, I'm planning to keep it set to accept anyone who wants to view it, most of the time. It's possible I might want to limit it to certain people later, at which point you'll need to give me your Yahoo ID so I can add it to an auto-accept list.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to many days of webcam fun. For now, I think I'm about ready for bed.

Well, I met Tiphony last night. I won't go into too many details of the later part of the night, for the sake of her privacy, but let's just say we had a very good night together. I think the start of the night is safe for typing out. We watched Mulan.. I'd never seen it before, and it was pretty decent. About halfway through, she cuddled up next to me. Once the movie was over, we watched an episode of Gargoyles... more cuddling during that. At the end of that episode, I put the next one on pause.

This is about the part where I put up the blurry censorship screen. Suffice to say, that episode stayed on pause until about 5AM this morning, when I got up to go to the bathroom and noticed it was still on.

It's kind of funny... when I first saw her profile, I didn't think we'd have all that much in common... but we just.. I don't know. We just... clicked, you know? Anyway, I think we're going to be seeing a lot more of each-other... especially with how close we live to each-other.

So as I was going through my past comments to look for friends to add to my friends list (see two entries back) I noticed a comment by Rikki on my somewhat-famous "drunk post":

You know, there's no real dramatic change between drunk Shane and sober Shane.

Other than the obvious decrease in motor skills, it's mostly that the drunk one likes to inform/remind people that he's drunk a lot. XD

...and also, i'd advise you to try something called the "Frozen Chicago", should you ever have the chance.
It involves some happy mixture of Bailey's, Kahlua, Smirnoff, and French Vanilla ice cream, and is quite possibly my favorite drink EVER. ;___;

I've tried a bit more things since I first saw that post, and actually know what Bailey's and Kahlua taste like. So I realized how great such a drink would be, and decided to do some further research.

The extent of my mom's knowledge is that Kahlua is a mixture of vodka and coffee, sometimes with some other ingredients (depending on who's making it). Combining Kahlua with vodka (in other words, adding more vodka and making it stronger) produces a drink called a "Black Russian." Combining Kahlua with milk (in other words, making it less alcoholic) produces a drink called a "White Russian."

Now, I looked up "Frozen Chicago," and found that the general recipe for it is just the ice cream and Irish Cream (Bailey's, in this case) which means that the drink Rikki had is basically a mixture of the generally accepted Frozen Chicago mixed with a Black Russian. Probably a bit stronger than the recipe I found online. Either way, it sounds excellent.

With my updated friend list...

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! Last Saturday I put gum in graywaters's hair (-12 points). In September I caught a purse-snatcher who stole ghostnose's purse (30 points). In November I bought porn for trixr4kids421 (-10 points). Last Sunday I ate my brussel sprouts (1 points). In March I pulled over and changed im_a_woman's flat tire (15 points). Overall, I've been nice (24 points). For Christmas I deserve a shiny red ball! Sincerely, zetan

I tried to update my friends page today... add the people I've met recently who have an LJ, remove the people I don't really talk to anymore...

So, what caused this quest to update? Well, I was bored, and reading away messages. Noticed that Lindsey's had either a poem or song lyrics (not sure which) about being lonely. This caused me to check her journal. I discovered that she's now living quite far away, on a co-op, and I hadn't known about it. I felt a little bad about being so out-of-the-loop.

From her journal, I found Matt's journal. I don't know if it's the Matt I know... er, even, a Matt I know, since I know a couple... but I found one of those LJ things that spits out random sentances with your friends on it. It's an amusing Christmas list one.

Only thing is, when I entered my name, it almost always used at least one LJ name of a friend I didn't really want there. So this is what drove me to update my friends.

Unfortunately, it seems the friend update takes a bit to update through all of LJ, since the list thing is still using my old friend list. I'll get to it eventually, though.

Okay, let's see. Starting from when I updated last... I did go the the club again last weekend. I did dress drag. It was fun. I met up with Debbie and Renee. Debbie and I got talking about alchohol, and eventually she invited me over to her place next Friday (next Friday then, yesterday now).

Between then and this weekend was mostly filled with work, me applying to SUNY Albany, and some WoW.

Last night, as I was going to sleep, I thought up 5 things I'd learned that night. Here they are, in the order I learned them, as a sort of introduction.

1) Debbie is really, really cool.
2) Tank tops still make me look more muscular than I really am.
3) Debbie has a boyfriend.
4) Renee should not drink.
5) Debbie is, in fact, the coolest person I have ever met, and were I not holding myself back after learning 3, I'd probably have a really, really big crush on her.

Okay, so the whole story. I get to Debbie's place and we decide we need more booze. She drives, we go out to Hannaford, get a Smirnoff Party Pack (since she likes the black cherry and I like everything else) and head back to her place. Upon entering, I notice a few things:

A)More than half of Buffy and Angel on DVD.
B)All of Evangelion on DVD.
C)An AD&D 2nd Edition Player's Handbook.
D)Chobits, Hellsing, Farscape... lots of other good DVDs.

This, along with some conversation, is where I came to the first thing on my introduction list. She actually knows what she's talking about with computers, watches anime, has (at least at one point) roleplayed... and here, I had thought photography would be the only thing we had in common.

We decided on me watching Farscape, since I've only seen, like, 2 episodes, and it was... at least 3 1/2 years ago. We got partway through and she decided to call Renee to see if she (and others) wanted to come over to hang out as well. This seemed to be the plan. Renee arrived, and Debbie asked if I wanted to go out with her to meet them. I put the DVD on pause and followed.

What happened next kind of confuses me still, but somehow, instead of Renee and others coming inside like I thought we had planned, Debbie and I entered the car and it started going somewhere. I am somewhat certain Debbie was as confused by this new plan as I was, but we both decided to go along with it.

We parked somewhere, when I met the other people in the car. The only other name I remember is Rachael, and I'm not even completely certain that was it. That's just my best guess. She was driving. Also in the car were a male and female who were very obviously a couple. I sat next to them on that initial ride, with Debbie sitting in the front and Renee sliding into the middle. In another car that pulled up (which may have been following us the whole time or may just have met us there, I'm not sure) was another guy. For ease of reference, if I need to refer to these people again, I shall use A and B (for the girl and guy in the couple, respectively) and C (for the guy in the other car). I really do feel bad about not knowing their names, but I am terrible with names, and I'm hoping at least one (if not all) of them forgot my name as well so that I don't look so stupid when they inevidably someday read this.

So anyway, we walked somewhere. Someone seemed to know where we were going, and it wasn't me. We arrived at a bar. I don't remember the name at all. After getting some drinks (Debbie suggested something blue to me... I forget what it was called, but I think it was mostly rasberry vodka, and was very tasty.... I drank those all night) we ended up going upstairs, where there were couches and room to dance. I had come wearing my most temerature-adjustable outfit, and the one I plan to wear (in various forms) to most clubs/bars from now on; zip-off cargo pants, tank top with button-down shirt over it. This outfit is perfect because if it gets hot, I can a)Unbutton the shirt and leave it hanging open to show the tank top, b)Take the shirt off and just wear the tank top, and/or, if I really wanted (I didn't last night) c)Zip off the bottoms of the pants to make them shorts. We started off just dancing a little and mostly sitting. The music was interesting... A large variety ranging from hip hop (the songs I didn't know) to Michael Jackson, Dire Straits, and "Sweet Home Alabama" (the songs I did know).

Once we had a few drinks in us, the dancing turned a little more... well, sexual. As usual, Debbie was flirting with all of the girls and none of the guys. I really didn't quite get this, completely, since she had mentioned being straight, but I figured it's just how she is. Anyway, I danced about equally with all at first. I think it was Renee who first did a "grind" dance with me. I havn't really had much experiend with this sort of dancing... but I have to say, it was quite enjoyable. Later, when Renee and Debbie were downstairs, I got talking to Rachael a bit more. By then, I had unbuttoned the top shirt. We hit it off pretty well at first, and did some grinding as well. It was very, very enjoyable.

Edit: Almost forgot one of my favorite parts of the night! Sometime in here, I'm pretty sure I was dancing with Rachael at the time, one of the jerks at the club (who was very, very drunk) came up and said to us, "You girls are so hot!" It was loud, so I might not have heard him correctly, but I'm reasonably certain that he thought we were both girls. It wasn't completely unreasonable, since there were girls grinding with girls, and with my hair... ah, but it was still very funny.

Anyway, somewhere soon after that, I took off the top shirt. I didn't notice at first, but Renee was quite impressed. This is about where I discovered number 2 in that list above. She started hanging around me a lot. There were some jerks in the club and one of them started hitting on her... she pulled a little closer to me and said "I'm with him." I took the hint and put my arm around her. The guy babbled a little about not being sure or whatever, then left seeming flustered. Renee smiled at me and thanked me, and I told her that I considered it a compliment to be "with her."

After that, I spent a lot more of the night with Renee. Rachael and I still danced once or twice, but Renee and I danced a lot more. During one dance, I kissed her on the back of the neck a few times. Near the end, she gave me a lap dance. First time I've ever gotten that. Meanwhile, on the opposite couch, Debbie was giving Rachael a lap dance. Good times.

Eventually, we left the bar. We were apparently headed for a pizza place. On the way there, Renee hit C. Now, I discovered later that she intended to hit him somewhat lightly in the chest area. Instead (probably due to the fact that she was more drunk than she'd ever been) she hit him rather hard in the face. Made his upper lip bleed. We ducked into a pizza place (not the one we'd intended to go to) to get him some ice. It really wasn't that bad, but Renee felt terrible about it.

It was at that pizza place that Debbie mentioned having a boyfriend. First I'd heard of it, but it explained a lot. The flirting with girls was okay, because what straight guy really minds his straight girlfriend playfully flirting with other girls?

So then, we drove to the actual, good pizza place (according to Rachael). She hadn't drank much, and so was okay to drive. Renee sat in the back with me this time, so A moved up to the front. On the way there, Renee gave me one of her rings, insisting that I'd been nice to her and she had enough of them. So I took it.

At the pizza place, it became very obvious why Renee shouldn't drink. She gets very sick. She was feeling sick the whole rest of the time... at the pizza place, and at the ride home.

I stayed at Debbie's place, even though I had mostly sobered up at that point. She was still somewhat drunk, as became evident when she started walking up the stairs.

During this second visit, I discovered just how cool she is. She makes this awesome techno-with-vocals music that she might actually make it big with. I don't remember all the details, but there's something about a contract in Japan. Also, she knows someone who has had sex with Ayumi Hamasaki, and has a pair of her dirty panties. She has excelent music tastes, and has seen both Gargoyles and Live Action Sailor Moon. I have never met a girl who has seen Live Action Sailor Moon without me showing it to her first.

So, yeah... if she was single, I would have such a huge crush on her... but she isn't, and I do have the ability to control such things. Kinda like I did with Rikki, once I found out she wasn't interested in relationships of any sort. So, instead, I'll shoot for us becoming very good friends... again, like Rikki and I.

Overall, very good Friday night. The only thing I'm a little concerned about is how to approach the whole Renee thing. I mean... Ian and her were kinda "supposed" to hook up. Practically everyone in the club was pushing for it that first night. But... well, I don't know how Renee really feels about either of us. And it should be her decision if she wants to be with either of us.

Hm... I suppose that's all. Not sure if I'm going out tonight or not. I told Renee and Debbie I might be there. Renee said she might be there. Havn't talked to Ian or Erin yet. Guess we'll see.

This won't be too wordy; this thing is hard to type on. I'm at Debbie's appartment, stealing her neighbor's internet to update from my PSP. Had a great time last night; more on that later, when I have a keyboard. Right now I'm kind of torn; she's still sleeping (don't know why I'm not; just woke up and wasn't tired anymore) and I don't want to wake her, but I don't want to just leave, either. Well, I think I hear her up; longer update later!

Last night was really my first time visiting a "club" of any sort, let alone one called a "goth club." But Erin and Ian wanted me to go, so.. *shrug* I figured I'd give it a try.

The first thing I discovered was that I don't own anything to wear to a "goth club," so they had me try on several things of Ian's until they found something that'd work. It was a costume night... the theme being witches, warlocks and the like. I went as a warlock, Ian as a demon I'd summoned, and Erin as my kitty familiar. Sounded reasonable enough to me. Of course, that whole thing kinda got put on the back-burner at the actual club.

For the first hour, at least, there was barely anyone there. Okay, it was still quite a slow night, even after the first hour, but there were at least a few more people. Ian called a girl he had apparently met there before and exchanged numbers with, and she agreed to come. She showed up with a couple friends around 2:30. We had been there since around 1. Erin and Ian were both drinking, but I was designated driver, so I only tried little sips of this and that.

Most people didn't even dress up... many of those who did weren't wearing very good costumes. Ian won the contest, which we found rather amusing since he was technically an accessory to my costume.

At first, I was a little bummed, because apparently another guy had invited Erin, and so she felt an obligation to pay attention to him for the night. Fair enough, but it did leave me feeling somewhat lonely and left-out. Plus, I didn't hear about this reason until later, so for most of the night, I was just feeling like I had been the one to drive Erin there and then she had just completely abandoned me for this guy. Once she explained it (around 3:45ish, almost at the end) I felt much better about that.

I think it was around 2:45ish when I got up the courage to talk to one of the girls there. The one Ian had invited was named Renee. She had a friend there, and they danced together a lot and generally kept each-other company. Seemed like best-friend types. This girl (who I later discovered was named Debbie, though I forgot and remembered her name at least three times throughout the night) was sitting off to the side for one dance, and I approached her, telling her it was my first time here. She was very encouraging, which was nice. I think part of what made it easier for me to just approach her out of the blue like that was the whole club environment. For one thing, it was darkened, so I didn't have to feel quite as self-consious about first visual impressions. Second, I had to talk loudly, and in her ear, in order for her to hear me, and she had to do the same for me. This broke the whole physical barrier that I usually feel when meeting new people, and once it's broken, it's a lot easier to feel comfortable with a person. I don't know, just my feeling about interactions and such. Whatever it was, it worked, and I was able to talk to this girl without inhabitions and the like.

She mentioned she was into photography, and I very quickly agreed to be a model for her, explaining that I've taken a liking to it as well, though prefer being in front of the camera rather than behind it. We talked about how Ian was in drag. Did I mention that his demon costume involved a red dress of Erin's? Guess not. Well, now I have. Anyway, I mentioned that I've dressed drag a few times as well, and pull it off pretty well myself (though not as well as Ian...) and she got extremely excited about the idea. I got flirty and mentioned that I'd only done it 4 times... 3 for halloween, and then one for a girl who asked nicely. She got a laugh and said something to the extent of, "Now I've got all these images.." to which I responded, "And they're probably fairly accurate." She got a good laugh, and eventually convinced me to show up at the same club next weekend, in drag. So, yeah, looks like I'll be doing that.

The other moment I was rather proud of myself was that after teasing/torturing Renee some (I had already noticed her doing this a decent amount) she turned to me and told me, "Just to warn you, I'm evil." I grinned and responded, "I like that in a woman." Which does tend to be true, in general, especially when they're up-front about it. Must be the massochist in me. Anyway, she laughed and said, "Well then we should get along just fine." I was definately quite happy with myself.

Anyway, at 4AM, when the club closed, everyone decided to go to a nearby diner. Everyone included Debbie, so naturally I was there. On the way there, I discovered that both Ian and Erin were a reasonable amount of drunk... not too bad, but enough to notice a difference in their speach and such. The diner was fun... much easier to talk, flirt, and generally get to know everyone else. Part of one conversation confirmed Debbie is straight, or at least bi... I had been starting to wonder. I was pretty sure she was flirting back, but sometimes just being friendly can be mistaken for flirting. Anyway, it's all good, and I think she likes me. We exchanged phone numbers, drank some soda, ate a little food, and eventually left sometime after 5:30. On the ride home, Erin fell asleep in my lap (yes, I was driving, she was in the passenger's seat... just her head was in my lap) and Ian fell asleep in the back seat. I'd had plenty of caffene and sugar, and no alchohol, so I was just fine. Got home around 6:30, after dropping them off and getting my first real kiss of the night from Erin, and went to bed (or cot) quite happy.

Today.... I finally got my bed setup! Along with most of the rest of my room. My desktop is almost completely fresh and new after a good reloading, and just about ready to be moved into the room for Warcracking. All in all, I'm feeling quite good about life.

You know, it does occur to me that the way I'm feeling about my life in general tends to be determined by the girls in my life. That's probably why this journal seems to focus on them so much. Speaking of which... tomorrow's Monday! Most of those I've been putting on hold due to vacations and such will be back! I can't wait...